...
computer on table for therapy online

Therapy using voice only can be better for some

Online support for eating disorders

Online support for people with an eating disorder.
I can offer (at any stage) some help in understanding and support for individuals suffering from an eating disorder and for the family and friends involved, I have extensive experience of helping people cope at this time. I can understand the complex issues that can arise and will be able to provide valuable support.

It’s not about pressurising people to eat or not eat but trying to understand why the problem is there to start with and allow them the space to untangle the complex issues they have to work through with compassion and respect.

Therapy needs to be supportive

I think that just trying to get them to eat will not often solve the problem, that approach may alienate the person from the start and make them feel threatened or distressed and therapy may have failed before it’s even started.

Therapy needs to be supportive, and the client needs to feel respected and not judged.
They are more than just a disorder but also people who are trying to cope with a complicated emotional issue.

Even if helping you is only a possibility then it may be possible

For me, the key to working with an eating disorder is to uncover the fears, thoughts and emotional turmoil driving the self-harming behaviour. Trying to bring the unconscious into consciousness, not why you under or overeat? Discovering what is behind the need for the behaviour is very important, but helping you towards recovery must be seen from what is possible for you to achieve, your support network and the present situation is an essential consideration regarding how you feel before looking at any hopeful expectation or improvements.

Facilitating change

We must allow for change within you as a unique person in your own right and not just offer ideas towards that change. Ultimately we are working toward giving you the tools and abilities to cope with new problems or cope with old issues effectively by yourself, this is the real goal of any therapy, to help you achieve a level of autonomy away from the therapeutic relationship, this is in itself an end of needing to be supported.

I am providing online counselling over Skype, with sound only and no video, for people who are having difficulties with an eating disorder.

Building confidence

It will usually help remove some of the issues around being judged or feeling exposed and anxious when talking to a therapist online. When internet-based options are used to deliver therapy, it can also help towards building confidence over time, before continuing to video sessions or even face to face sessions in the future if requested.

Using this type of online therapy service has another added benefit it’s more flexible as it only needs an Internet connection so you can use the service from home or anywhere you feel there is sufficient privacy for you to talk openly to find the help and support you need on your terms.

In some cases, just the act of seeking help and finding it will raise confidence and make it easier to cope with what may be a short term problem, the ability to talk to someone who is impartial and non-judgemental can lead to a different insight or perspective.

Some recognised eating disorders

Anorexia


Anorexic people starve themselves with the aim of losing weight to a point which others would consider to be very thin, although the sufferer is unlikely to see themselves as such. The longer the condition continues, the more difficult it can be to tackle, and in severe cases can require hospitalisation and can even prove fatal. Sufferers are typically in their teens or twenties, and most are women, although around 10% are male. Symptoms can be recognised as distorted perceptions of one’s weight, size and shape, behaviour which results in a marked weight loss, a morbid fear of gaining weight or becoming fat, excessive exercising, cessation of periods in women.

Bulimia


Bulimic people may well maintain their healthy weight. Bouts of eating followed by purging characterise the condition. They can have a distorted perception of their own weight, size and shape, a powerful urge to overeat, leading to binge eating and a resultant feeling of being out of control, compensatory behaviour such as self-induced vomiting; misuse of laxatives, diuretics or other medication, fasting, or excessive exercise, a morbid fear of gaining weight or becoming fat.

Binge eating disorder


Constant binge eating and the consequent feeling of being out of control marked emotional distress about binge eating and the attempts to control it. During a binge they may eat more quickly than usual, eat until they feel over-full, consuming large amounts when not hungry. The behaviour will generally be done in secret; they often will feel disgusted and guilty with themselves, body weight may vary from being a healthy weight to, moderate, or severe obesity.

The sufferer will have problems with obsessive thoughts and behaviours; this is their only way of dealing with emotional distress, which for them cannot be expressed appropriately. This behaviour is used as a way of trying to control the inner pain they feel.

This emotional distress is often to do with a negative perception of self, owing to low self-esteem and self-worth, and a feeling of being unable to change their belief about unachievable ideas or distressing and unrealistic ideals. Some media influences like magazines or some TV programs may help influence what to them constitutes perfection, but this is not always the case, some people often feel a strong need to be thinner as a way of solving their inner confusion.

“When I am thin everything will be OK “

For me, the key to working with an eating disorder is to uncover the fears thoughts and emotional turmoil, that is driving the self-harming behaviour. Trying to bring the unconscious into conscious, not why does the client under or overeat?, By uncovering what is behind the need to do so, the answer towards recovery can be seemingly obvious like a past trauma or abusive relationship, but that is not often the case. Helping the client towards that recovery must be understood from what is possible for the person to achieve at that time, the support network and the present situation is important regarding any hopeful expectation or improvements.

Allowing for change

We must allow for change within the person, and not just offer ideas towards that change. Ultimately we are working toward giving them the tools and abilities to cope with new problems or cope with old issues effectively by themselves, this is the real goal of any therapy, to help the client achieve a level of autonomy away from the therapeutic relationship, is in itself an end of needing to be helped.

The family can think that they are often forgotten, pushed into the background, seemingly thought of as not needing help, the person suffering from the disorder takes all the focus, and this can leave the family and friends feeling helpless or frustrated or even secretly angry at the person suffering from this problem.

When families suffer

The family can suffer in several ways, the stress placed on the relationships can lead to infighting as each person struggles to cope with the anxiety and frustration, it’s not the family’s fault but a symptom of the stress and fear that loved ones feel in times of need when faced with a long term problem.

Family Support with online therapy


I can offer at any stage some help in understanding and support for the family, and I have extensive experience of the family suffering at this time. I can understand the complex issues that can arise and will be able to provide valuable support. Perhaps this can help release the pent up emotions and allow for a better understanding of your own needs at this time. Doing this will enable the family to be in a better position to offer the right help and at the same time allow for their own important needs to be better understood.

The Forgotten Family


Within the family the stresses placed on the relationships and individuals at this time can lead to isolation and withdrawal, feelings of anger and frustration can lead to arguments and feeling rejected as each person struggles to cope with the anxiety and frustration involved.
It’s a symptom of the stress and fear that loved ones can feel in times of need when faced with a long term problem such as this.

Any hidden issues within you or in the relationship itself can come to the surface under such pressure, and this can add to the problems when trying to help and support others, talking about it in online therapy using Skype can help you cope better and become part of the solution not add to the problem.

Hidden issues

Any hidden issues within you or in the relationship itself can come to the surface under such pressure; this can add to the problems when trying to help and support others, talking about it in online therapy using Skype can help you cope better and become part of the solution not add to the problem.

The family can think that they are often forgotten, pushed into the background, seemingly thought of as not needing help, the person suffering from the disorder takes all the focus, and this can leave the family and friends feeling helpless or frustrated or even secretly angry at the person suffering from this problem.

Pent up emotions

Exploring this can help release the pent up emotions and allow for a better understanding of your own needs at this time. Supporting you to be in a better position to offer the right help at the right time.

It does not matter if you’re a Father or Mother, what matters is how you are coping with the stress involved with what can be a worrying and stressful time.
Doctors and other health workers can forget that the family are also in need, it is often the case that time is limited and the person at highest risk needs all the available time spent on them.
Seeing a loved one trying to cope can at times be very distressing and frightening.

    • What’s best for you? Psychotherapy or counselling

      What is the difference between psychotherapy & counselling? Psychotherapy is the use of psychological techniques to help clients to understand why they act and feel the way they do; it can help change, feelings, thoughts, or habits. To relieve symptoms of emotional distress or behavioural problems, and this can achieve higher levels of self-awareness and […]

      Read More

    • The Jonny Dep and Amber Heard case shows the difficulty for victims of abuse to be able to come forward.

      The fear of not being believed is always a hurdle to overcome for many victims of partner abuse, especially for men, women do abuse men evidentially not as often as men abuse women. But the numbers of men being abused is going to look much lower than it really is, many men will feel ashamed […]

      Read More

    • Online therapy is it secure without HIPPA?

      ,

      Do you need HIPPA for online therapy services? I get the sense that some online therapists are trying to sound superior to other therapists who do not use their HIPPA system of choice.  If I told you that as a therapist if use your computers to talk to clients and also use them for sending […]

      Read More

    • How online therapy can help with your depression

      Online therapy help for depression online therapy for depression First, I am going to set out some conditions that must be met for any online therapy to be successful. The person with depression seeking help needs to be able to feel at ease talking to people over the internet, either just using their voice with […]

      Read More

    • free online therapy?

      ,

      Looking for free therapy online? Where to find free therapy? There needs to be an understanding that there is always a cost involved for the online therapist or online therapy service when providing free counselling or psychotherapy online. This often includes payments for managing websites, equipment, insurance, the therapists or website staff costs, and many […]

      Read More

    • Internet addiction does it exist?

      Internet addiction, does it exist? What is internet addiction? Does internet addiction actually exist? When people become addicted, it is usually due to physical or emotional needs that need to be met. so, a physical addiction like an alcoholic who needs to drink and the addict who needs the high provided by the drug would […]

      Read More

    • Can AI provid therapy

      How long before therapy is provided by AI There is nothing wrong with simple mental health apps to help people meditate relax and be mindful. But there are misguided people out there who think that an app powered by artificial intelligence, will one day be suitable for people suffering from mental health issues like depression, […]

      Read More

    • Bad therapists providing bad therapy

      How many bad therapists are there? Even good therapists can change over time. What I call good therapists gone bad.

      Read More

    • Does meditation help emotional issues?

      Is meditation helpful for emotional issues? We live in a world of quick-fix expectations; we are raised in the modern world to expect that whatever your problem is, you can find a pill to fix it. And people are often in a hurry to deal with any illness or emotional problem quickly, especially when constantly […]

      Read More

    • Counselling for grieving pet owners

      Pet loss counselling When your much-loved pet dies the emotional impact can be devastating, indeed the word pet almost seems to demean the relationship. They can become much more than just pets, indeed they become part of the family unit, and their loss is often felt deeply by everyone within the family. Even when children […]

      Read More